The Fetish: Freakish or Fine?

By: Vicki Santillano (View Profile)

Garment Fetishism
The eroticism of articles of clothing or uniforms. No wonder we see so many naughty nurses, slutty secretaries, and mischievous milk maidens wandering around every Halloween.

Pictophilia
Sexual excitement from pictures or videos of sex. People like watching sex? Now there’s a shocker.

Pyrophilia
One aspect of this fetish involves deriving pleasure from intercourse with a burning corpse. I have no idea how this would work, but it seems like there might be some serious logistical issues, not to mention medical dangers.

Retifism
Having sexual feelings toward shoes, feet, heels. So that’s why Carrie Bradshaw had all those Manolos.

Taphephilia
Being buried alive as a way to get off. That better be one good orgasm.

Archnephilia

Sexual attraction to spiders. These fetishists are typically big fans of the Grandaddy Longlegs species.

This is just a sampling of some of the fetishes I found while digging around online, but there are thousands—maybe even millions—more, which made me wonder if the people who don’t have fetishes are really the ones with the so-called dysfunction.

Of course, I’m not sure that relying on a single item for sexual gratification is completely normal; I guess it all depends on what the fetish is and whether or not it results in risky behavior. For example, some people find panty or foot fetishes odd, but not necessarily a cause for alarm. It’s when a particular fetish interferes with sexual function or creates an unsafe environment (see pyrophilia and taphephilia, listed above) that it might be time to pay a visit to your shrink and delve deep into your childhood.

But no matter what your fetish, if you can find someone to share it with and it doesn’t negatively interfere with your everyday life, I say let your fetish flag fly. Based on the ten million Web sites that come up when you type “fetish” into Google, I’m guessing that finding a partner in crime will be no problem. 

 

9 readers liked this story.
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This was indeed hilrious and yet very informative about the various mental issues that exist, of course only obvious when humans have the need to get off.
posted: 03.25.2008
Sister Sadist
I really enjoyed this, I hope to see more!
posted: 03.19.2008
T Bone
Very nice work! I laughed, I cried, I held my breath in disbelief. I look forward to reading more of your work. You got some talent kid and there needs to more people who write with wit, intelligence and a thumb on pop culture. I'll be coming back for seconds as long as you're serving. Oh and there needs to be an entry for foodnetworkaphilia: Those who get off watching Paula Dean make her famous double butter triple chocolate peanut butter cream dreams. The fetish mostly found in older, heavy set office women.
posted: 03.19.2008
Bill Tourangeau
First story, huh? Very nice... witty, kept moving at a good pace... great work! Now if youll excuse me, I have a corpse to go set ablaze and fornicate. I mean, I need to go make a sandwich...
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