I tell people all the time that I’m a psychologist, not a psychic, so take what I’m about to say with a grain.
My hunch is that you go for men who aren’t clear with their intentions while zipping past men who are interested. You might even think a man who openly pursues you is cheesy or weird because you’re not used to a man who’s bold with his feelings. If this sounds true, I have two suggestions. First, go see a male therapist. Uncover old feeling hurts and find out what keeps you from feeling loveable. Second, give some available men a shot. Maybe take a chance on that over-eager guy who calls or emails a bit too much. I am not suggesting you should settle for someone you aren’t attracted to at all. But it’s possible that your relationship radar is a bit out of whack, so you might need to broaden your selection criteria.
As for Mr. Romantic Multitasker, do your best to forget about him. Most men wouldn’t get back together with a girlfriend if they’ve met someone they like more. Either he’s not interested or he’s got some serious co-dependency issues. Wait for a man who won’t waste your time. Only give this guy a shot if he pulls his head out of his keister and gives you more than his emotional spare change.
Read the April Ask the Man Shrink column
Read the February Ask the Man Shrink column
Ask the Man Shrink is published monthly. Each column features a real question from a reader, and we invite other readers to respond with their thoughts and insights by posting comments. If you have a question for Stephen, please send it to him care of the editor at rbrown@realgirlsmedia.com. Your question will be kept in the strictest of confidence.
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