Keeping the Fire Burning

As a woman in a ten year old relationship that’s had more downs then ups, I’ve learned tricks to keep my relationship fun and fresh. Yes, girls it’s essentially up to us. We are looking to blame our partner for the staleness in our relationship but from experience and observation I know that we hold the power to make or break our relationships. Therefore, we have the power to keep things going for the better.

Following you’ll find a list of things I do to keep things fun and fresh:

1. Giggle: Yes, I giggle! My husband goes crazy when I do. (Example: When I see something I absolutely love, I start babbling on about it and start giggling like a teenager.)

2. Laugh: Yes, we have to laugh at his joke for the ten thousandth time.

3. Role playing: Yes, we must play along sometimes and let them know that we are way better than the twenty one year old across the street that waters her plants in a bikini.

4. Be grateful: Men love when you are truly, genuinely grateful for them finally finishing the basement after ten years (don’t show cynicism).

5. Be cuddly and loving: Yeah. Remember when you use to cuddle up to him on the couch and pretend like you liked watching Top Gun, again?

6. Be available: It’s hard between the kids, house cleaning, and work schedules to do so but you’d be a much happier woman for doing so!

7. Date night: Yes! No time? Make time. Go to that little bar on Main Street where you’ve wanted to go for so long. Have some drinks, make fun of the couple at the other table, and love each others company once again. What can beat that? Quality, not necessarily quantity is essential for maintaining a fresh and fun relationship.

As much as women try to say that men are the only ones that need the sexual part of a relationship, it’s not true. Women desire it and need it too. That time that you could spend engulfed in each others arms and releasing the tensions of everyday life is so essential for all the other aspects of your relationship to function. We need that time to remind each other that we’ve still go it!

No matter how hard women may try to become “equals” with men, I believe it to be impossible because we are different. We are females, who are beautiful, sexy, intelligent, uplifting, courageous, strong, instinctive, intuitive, and so much more.

In the first years, I lost myself in the battle of who is the boss. I decided to give my partner his much desired position and accept my place as an enhancer. A man who feels respected, honored, loved, and even spoiled, is a much better man all around. He’ll be great in the home; he’ll be great with the kids; and last but not least, he’ll be great with you.