The National Council for Adoption: Mothers, Money, Marketing, and Madness, Part 3

Previously, mothers who surrendered were expected to slink back with their secrets into normal life, but now, they are taught to be proud and wear their birth mother status as a red badge of courage. As mothers talk to other mothers and share the experiences, they realize that they are not alone in their natural feelings of grief and loss. As younger mothers talk to older mothers they see their own future ahead where time will not heal this wound. The true information that contradicts the NCFA message is easier to come by.

For what ever the reason, mothers are finding out sooner, rather than later, that living through adoption is not all it was portrayed to be. No longer does it take forty years until an adult adoptee reunites, or even eighteen until they are of age for the message to come home. Not even a few years into a continuously painful open adoption, or the birth of the second, parented child, that allows a mother to see what she has lost is needed. For those who bother to notice, the cries of pain and despair are happening very soon after surrender. One mother who runs a support board just recently agreed: “I have noticed a change in the air lately. You are totally right. I’ve had so many Moms come here as soon as they place regretting their decision. I wish we could get to more before they sign the papers,” and then, it is too late.

Perhaps, the NCFA’s systematic and over saturated teachings are being given to women who would not have, in earlier years, been as vulnerable to the “adoption option.” Perhaps the market is so desperate for infants and the high profits that an infant relinquishment brings to an adoption business those women are subjected to this “goodmother” scrutiny when previously they would not be even seen on an agencies radar. Perhaps the professionals have polished their skills to such perfection that mothers are truly not “choosing” but getting convinced, brainwashed even, into giving away their babies.

It actually has to be expected. The bottom line is that the National Council for Adoption wants mothers to be separated from their children. Their very existence was conceived to make family separation seem like a good idea and teach others in the field the same positive view. The NCFA does this to protect their members’ interests. Their members are adoption agencies. Adoption agencies make billions of dollars in profits from family separation. They need babies to continue business. Millions of dollars given and spent to convince the public and mothers that giving your baby away is a good thing. And for what reason?

Follow the money.