In Other Words

“Eric thinks the white stuff that comes from cows is called “ball.”

My husband just rolled his eyes and glanced over at our little tow-headed student happily sipping “ball” through a straw.

At the same season in my life, questions on higher vocabulary were being sprung on me by my older children. A few days later, I was explaining to Josh, then eight, that a triangle has three sides because “tri” means three, quadrangles have four sides because “quad” means four and octagons have eight sides because “oct” means eight.

“What has six sides?” he said.

I thought for a moment. A horrible feeling of ineptness crept over me. I drew a blank. I was in the middle of a severe brain warp.

Surely it can’t be a sexagon! I gasped to myself.

My son waited.

“Uh, I can’t remember. I’ll have to get back to you on that one, Josh.”

Hours later in the grocery store the black hole that had swallowed my brain retreated and my random access memory was restored. I suddenly remembered.

“A HEXAGON!” I shouted to the cereal boxes.

I couldn’t wait to get home and tell my son so I wouldn’t lose my tenure.

I felt much better after I told him. Unfortunately, like many triumphs in parenting, the euphoria was temporary. Minutes later I realized my son probably had deduced that women who give birth to six babies at once are said to have had hextuplets.

Seriously though, all of us teach by what we say, and not just during those years when we are parenting little ones. Our role as “language teachers” is especially heightened when our children are young, but our influence as communicators doesn’t stop when our kids have mastered the vocabulary. As our children grow, they learn less from what we say and more from how we say it.

My children are now teenagers and young adults and have long since conquered the English language. They aren’t learning vocabulary from me anymore. But they are picking up on other things I say. And as I relinquish more and more of my influence over them I am glad to know that words of affirmation and respect still go a long way.