My dream since becoming a parent is to be a full time stay at home mother. Those who know me best will agree that I speak of this dream often. Thankfully, my husband shares this dream with me, but on a sheriff's department salary this is not possible without serious changes in finances that would put us somewhere near poverty level.
My heart aches to see my son hop off the school bus in the afternoon and have cookies and milk waiting for him. To share about his day and laugh about the hilarious descriptions of his world. To take the guilt that rests firmly off my shoulders every day that I know he's in that cruddy after school program sponsored by the primary school he attends. Don't get me wrong, I am thankful to God for this program but I know that he is just a number to those who run the program and doesn't get the personal attention he could have with me at home.
I pray to God often that this can be possible in the near future, and believe that only He could bring this to pass. It's something that I believe would satisfy a deep need in myself and my son. What a long day for a 5 year old... he is at school before I am at work, then I pick him up after work on most days! Thankfully my husband is able to pick him up some days when school is out because of his night shift schedule at the sheriff's department.
