“Adults understand the bigger picture and what the risks are of adolescence and childbearing,” Brown says. “Adolescents see it through the lens of the ‘me generation.’ Adolescence is also a self-absorbed time. If the baby got handed off and she got the boyfriend back (as happens in Juno), what’s the problem?”
Brown says part of her concern is the film’s tone toward unintended pregnancy. “We’re all now tolerant and non-judgmental. Apparently that now extends to getting pregnant and having babies,” she says.
It’s a tough call. On one hand, I don’t think we as a society should come down too hard on a pregnant teen who’s chosen to have her baby. She has made a brave decision, one that will brand her with what’s essentially a large sign bearing the words “I had premarital sex” for months. Pregnancy and its aftermath were some of the most difficult challenges I’ve ever faced. I don’t feel I need to add to it with a disapproving glance when I see a teenager with a baby bump.
On the other hand, I feel squeamish hearing my stepdaughter and her friend discuss it like it’s no big deal. I was appalled to hear about a baby shower one of my stepdaughter’s pregnant acquaintances had, one that was given and attended by teen girls. I don’t want her to feel like getting pregnant is just one of many possible and unexpected directions her life could take, hence my ridiculous behavior when the subject came up.
“It would be weird to be grounded while you’re pregnant,” my stepdaughter’s friend said. “But Laney’s mom wouldn’t let her wear makeup after she got pregnant, so .. ” I giggled, despite myself.
“Okay, she wouldn’t really be grounded,” I said. “I just don’t want you guys to think that it wouldn’t be a big, horrible ordeal. Because it would. Having sex in high school is just a really bad idea.”
“It’s not just pregnancy,” her friend mused. “You could also get an STD,”
“But aren’t those curable?” my stepdaughter asked.
“The problem is, you don’t always know you’ve got one until its done serious damage,” I said ominously. “You could end up with major problems. Infertility. Cancer. Bad, bad problems.” I must have looked like a moron. This was not how I’d pictured myself discussing teen sex at all.
So how will you handle it with your kids when the time comes? How did you handle it, if you have older children? And do you worry that Jamie Lynn Spears, movies like Juno, and even pregnant teens in your own community will give your kids the impression that teen pregnancy is no longer that big of an issue?
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