Have you ever had a moment when time stops? I like to think of these moments as a combination of déjà vu and stark premonition of what’s to come. This happened one night last week. My husband was getting our five-year-old son ready for bed. They were on the couch reading a book when his computer on the coffee table dings, alerting him of an email. He looks up at it and sees an email with pictures from a recent trip. He opens them up and starts showing William, explaining that one of his friends from college took the pictures. Then he says, “You know Todd and Rick—I met them in college, too. I made some of my best friends in college. You will, too. You’re going to love going to college,” Jay says innocently.
William looks up suddenly and instead of smiling, his face is twisted with worry. His dad just giggles and then tells William to brush his teeth. On the way to the bathroom William asks:
“Am I going to college?”
“You bet!” answers his dad.
William is quiet and then when climbing into his loft bed says sadly, “I don’t want to go to college.”
Jay replies, “Sure you do! They’ll be some of the best years of your life.”
“How long do I have to go?” William’s eyes are now full of tears.
“Four years, maybe longer if you want a master’s,” replies Jay, who I realize from my vantage point in the den, doesn’t quite grasp how William will interpret that information. Most five-year-olds, I’ve learned, can’t quite understand the concept of time. I start to walk to his room to help, but before I could reach it, hear:
“I’m not going to go!! I want to stay here with you and Mommy!!!!”
Jay begins to laugh at first and then when I arrive at William’s door, we see tears streaming down our son’s face.
“Hey, hey, it’s not for a long time. You’re not going now,” his dad explains.
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