How to Have the Best School Year with Your Sensitive Child

Whatever happens, you will have tried some new things. And who knows, your small efforts today might just make enormous marks in your sensitive child’s future success. Good luck!

When Helping with Schoolwork, Be Gentle, and Subtle.

Have you noticed that sensitive kids easily feel overwhelmed, uncomfortable, insulted, and patronized? For best results, first ask them questions that are focused on feelings (not facts). Then offer your encouraging supplemental instruction.

When On the Playground, Say it’s OK Not To Play.

Because these children are highly intuitive, they are able to sense negative moods and feelings of others. Left to their own devices they often learn to scheme and daydream their way out of social situations, even play. Offer private validation of their choice to simply observe. Your patient understanding will usually draw the sensitive child back into the fold on his or her own accord.

When Chaperoning a Child’s Birthday Party, Let ‘Em Hide.

Forcing sensitive kids to go against their nature by talking to new people, making eye contact or performing, playing or dressing in front of others can be traumatic and can perpetuate social anxiety. Sometimes a birthday party can be very overwhelming for a sensitive child. Let them be shy for a short time (taking “breaks” when they need to), but check on them very regularly to know they aren’t forgotten. A quick, repeated check-in of “just wanted you to know I love you” does wonders.

When Your Child Acts “Different” from Most Kids, Ask the Experts, Not the Child.

Sensitive kids don’t know why they act differently from other children and asking them only asks for trouble. Save your questions for experts, or connect and share successes and frustrations with other parents and teachers who are in regular contact with sensitive children.

When Tears Flow and They Can’t Say Why, See the World on their Shoulders.

Extra-sensitive kids want to save the world. When they can’t they feel guilty. To ease the already guilt-ridden child, replacing esteem eroding comments like, “you’re too emotional,” with validating statements like, “I know you have a big heart and feel things very powerfully” can re-establish trust and a sense of security with the child.