Kindergarten Discipline Woes

I loved your story! Reminded me of my youngest son when he was in school. One of his teachers put masking tape on his mouth because he was talking in class! Needless to say,my husband went to school the next day. She didn't pull that little stunt again! So,I totally agree with your disipline measures. I was raised in the South also so I know what you're talking about when you say you were taught to "respect your elders". I have a scar inside my bottom lip now for disrespecting my dad!! Of course that was 42 years ago!We don't do things like that now but restriction and taking away of the things they think they can't do without really hurts at that age. Keep up the good work! You should be so proud and keep in mind, you're going to raise a good, decent young man!

Great article! I agree six year olds need consequences to understand what is expected of them and what will get them the outcome they are looking for. I work with adults and children in creating positive habits for problem solving and conflict resolution. My own son (6.5 yrs.) is a sponge for what I call Possibility Thinking (TM) which gets to the root of behavior instead of what I call "frontal attack". When he runs into trouble at school I ask him to tell me what the situation means to him. Perception is reality for all of us! The problem comes into play when our behavior is driven by a negative interpretation of an event. For instance, my son's friend says "I don't want to play with you today" and my son perceives the situation as final - "he doesn't like me anymore", "he's not my friend anymore" all very sad and hurtful (meanings) interpretations for him. So we play the game of Possibility Thinking(TM). Is it possible that your friend was just in a mood? Is it possible?

Great piece! I can relate all too well. Your sounds like quite the social butterfly. I do not think the punishment is unfair (six year olds need consequnces) but it might be more effective to alienate him from his audience. I bet he would settle down quicker if isolated for a brief time. Maybe threaten him with doing a solo instead of performing with the whole group if he misbehaves!

I have a son much like yours. I keep a hat on and head down in preschool carpool line. My daughter's completely different. He starts Kindergarten next year so I'm nervous. Suggested reading: ``Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Health of Boys'' by Dan Kindlon; and Positive Discipline'' and ``The Spirited Child'' by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka. The latter two were suggested to me by Project Enlightenment here in Raleigh. They've helped me understand him and try to guide him a little better. Thanks for writing that. Nice to know there are others out there!