Have you successfully started a diet and then after a while sabotaged yourself and quit? Have you reached your goal weight and then gained it back? Do you sometimes eat when you’re not hungry, over eat meals, binge, or feel out of control with food?
If so, there is something very important going on underneath the surface which is running the show. You have remarkably good reasons for keeping yourself heavy and for turning to food.
Once you uncover these reasons they begin to turn around! It takes being curious and compassionate with yourself. It helps to have a coach to guide you and create a safe, comfortable space for you to explore and discover. When what is behind the scenes comes out and shows itself, it’s easier to deal with than you may have thought it would be.
As adults, we have hundreds of times more spindle cells in the brain to process emotions than we did as a child! From the circumstances and situations of our early life, we inevitably create beliefs that get embedded into our subconscious mind. The subconscious mind is like a tape recorder, playing the tape that it was given. When we realize which old tape is running in our lives, we can then choose to change the tape!
In coaching emotional eaters, I have heard many good reasons for holding on to extra weight. Here are a few:
“My husband has to learn to love me unconditionally, no matter what size I am, before I am willing to lose the weight.”
“If I become attractive again, I’ll get into another intimate relationship. He’ll leave me and then I’ll have to face being rejected again.” Feeling the pain of her father leaving the family, she came to believe that men leave her because she’s not good enough.
“People will start to expect more from me. I will probably disappoint them.” She was often made to feel like a failure as a child.
“As a teenager, I learned that bad things happen when you have an attractive body. I was also punished a lot and made to feel like I’m a bad person when my stepmother came onto the scene.” By binging and mentally beating herself up over it, she could continue feeling bad on her own.
