The Worst Artery Cloggers in America

By: Brie Cadman ( Little_person View Profile)

We know that fast food isn’t good for us. But some restaurants have simply gone overboard with the amount of fat, salt, calories, and carbs they’ve managed to pack into a meal. Below are the worst of the worst.

Breakfast of Caloric Champions: Denny’s Smoked Sausage Slam

This is the meal to eat if you like pig products: two eggs scrambled with chopped bacon, diced ham, and crumbled sausage, then topped with cheddar cheese. All rounded out with two strips of bacon, two sausage links, hash browns, and two fluffy buttermilk pancakes. The amount of sodium in this pile of pig garbage is enough to last you two days … if you don’t die of a heart attack first.

A better bet: Two eggs, bacon, and toast. It ain’t health food, but it won’t be a day’s worth of calories either.

Worst Thing You Can Eat with a Spoon: KFC Mashed Potato Bowl

The KFC bowl is for those who can’t be bothered with a plate. It’s a tub filled with mashed potatoes, layered with sweet corn, and “loaded” with pieces of fried chicken. To add insult to injury, they dump “home-style” gravy and cheese on top. I have a feeling this thing comes out in your toilet bowl looking the exact same way it went in.

A better bet: avoid KFC altogether.

Worst Meal in Tin Foil: Chipotle Barbacoa Super Burrito

The other day my coworkers and I went to Chipotle. It was all shits and giggles while we were eating—“hey, pass the guac!” “want some more chips?!”—but then about an hour later, things went terribly wrong. Our stomachs hurt. Our mouths puckered. I drank about a gallon of water but couldn’t seem to quench my thirst. The bathroom stunk.

I think it’s ironic that Chipotle sponsors a biking team. No athlete would ever eat there.

A better bet: Cut the monster in half and share it.

Money Well Spent: Carl’s Jr. Bacon Cheese Six Dollar Burger

A day’s worth of fat in one meal—not bad for six bucks. Of course, if you eat this, you probably shouldn’t eat anything for the rest of the day.

A better bet: A regular Carl’s hamburger.

Worst Italian Offense: Pizza Hut Meat Lover’s Personal Pan Pizza

The “personal” in this title makes one assume you’re supposed to eat the whole thing yourself. And then you do. And people wonder why we have an obesity epidemic.

A better bet: Veggie Lover’s—it’s “only” 560 calories.

Just Wrong, Mate: Outback Steakhouse Aussie Cheese Fries

Are the Aussies trying to mock us by giving us something they know we could never possibly work off in one day? Even if you split this monster of a fat bomb with three friends—it’s still just a side dish, and you’d still be packing away almost one thousand calories each. That’d take about two hours of kangaroo chasing in the outback just to burn off. Problem is, we ain’t got no outback in the US of A.

A better bet: Share the cheese fries with ten people instead.

Worst Dessert: Outback’s Chocolate Thunder from Down Under

I don’t mean to pick on Outback (who now no longer posts their nutritional information), but what were they thinking with this name? It reminds me of what happens after you’ve eaten there, not something you’d like to end a meal with. To burn this off you’d have to run for over two hours. Hmm … an apple isn’t sounding so bad after all.

A better bet: I would never feed this to a child, but you could order the Spotted Dog Sundae off the kid’s menu, and split it with another adult. It has 730 calories and 27 grams of saturated fat; diet food compared to the Thunder.

(Continued on Next Page)

(Info Sources: CalorieKing.com, Eat This, Not That by David Zinczenko)

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Comments

By the way, I do agree with Biker Mania's comments. I know of several athletes, myself included, that absolutely love Chipotle and other burrito places. The ingredients are FRESH, which is very important, and loaded with great stuff. Just go easy on the cheese and it's a great meal full of nutrition. I also know of several professional athletes that have a pre-game ritual of eating a burrito (just look it up on Google). The good thing about being an athlete is pretty much the ability to eat just about as much as you want, because you'll need every calorie to keep you going. Despite what most people think, calories are good. Without 'em we die - not to mention eating a 5 times a day and staying active helps to boost your metabolism. The problem is when we eat TOO many calories and DON'T do anything to BURN them off. Laziness is the main cause of obesity.

Great article but I must say....It all looks yummy to me! I'm from the South so we fry everything doesn't move fast enough. LOL

I enjoyed reading this article. It is a good start to create change in the American diet.

What a GREAT article. Thank you Brie Cadman. The information is sadly amazing and the commentary is hilarious.

I was kind of surprised this one wasn't on the list: P.F. Chang's China Bistro has a dessert called: The Great Wall of Chocolate. It is described as: "Six layers of rich chocolate cake frosted with semi-sweet chocolate chips and served with raspberry sauce." It is 2,240 calories a slice. What's worse is that dessert is intended to to follow one of their meals - the majority of which hover around 1,100 calories. Yikes. Prepare to be astonished: http://www.pfchangs.com/cuisine/menu_main.aspx

Great article but I must say....It all looks yummy to me! I'm from the South so we fry everything doesn't move fast enough. LOL

I enjoyed reading this article. It is a good start to create change in the American diet.

What a GREAT article. Thank you Brie Cadman. The information is sadly amazing and the commentary is hilarious.

Great write up, just a note, I am from Australia (came here 12 months ago) and Australians do not eat Cheese Fries, Outback is not representative of Australian cuisine. I didn't know people would put liquid cheese on fries (chips) and was shocked to see that the USA even has liquid cheese!

Thanks for the challenge, I'll have to eat all this in one hour...and put it on youtube.

Um... as far as Chipotle is concerned, I personally know many bikers and other athletes who are always seeking top performance. In fact one of my friends beat floyd landis in an XC race the other week. If you don't know biking, floyd landis 'won' the last Tour de France. And they all eat at Chipotle. My brother is in one of the most rigorous physical training regiments and eats there 5-8 times a week. Sometimes he'll have one before practice and one after. And really? Of all the nasty shit we eat you think that a burrito mostly comprised of rice and beans is in the top ten? not fish and chips? not grits? not twinkies? So I'd have to say that NO, it is not ironic that they sponsor a biking team. I think it is smart. Its carbo-loading combined with protein for recovery. Honestly

I agree with Kimberly. The "American" diet is bad because of the live fast and die young mentality that accompanies it. I regularly eat at the Outback and have no fears of the Bloomin Onion or Aussie Cheese Fries b/c my diet is balanced and I grew up with daily/weekly nutritional goals as a child. Nutrition starts at home and Anything You Order At Any Restaurant Will Likely Be Bad For You. Has anybody tried the "Baconator" at Wendy's??? It is delicious and will give you a great night's sleep after you eat it!

Keep in mind not everyone can survive on the average 2,000 calories per day. I alone need over 3,000 calories just to MAINTAIN my current body weight (that's with no activities). So add in a healthy, active lifestyle and I'm consuming about 3,500 calories a day and I'm no fatty. I've kept my metabolism high by eating regularly and staying active. Eating some of these foods would have little effect on my weight, but the high amounts of sodium and saturated fats are what's the real problem. Always know your own personal limits - get with a personal trainer if you need to and have them write up an active diet plan and your caloric limits. Though these foods are harmful if eaten regularly, they are also good rewards every once in awhile to keep food as a friend and not the enemy. Mmm...

If you want to save money, just go on the fast food diet - 2 bucks for a cheeseburger that will fulfill your entire caloric needs for the day! That would almost be impressive if it weren't so disgusting! I honestly think that the marketers that think up these new food ideas probably just sit back and laugh, wondering how many ridiculously fattening things they can come up with that people will still put into their bodies.

Of course, the most important thing here is to maintain a healthy view of the food itself: it isn't a terrible thing or something to be avoided, but it is important to be aware of information like this, and to be responsible about what you eat. It's perfectly okay to eat an Awesome Blossom once in a while, you don't need a gym membership, as long as it's just once in a while. Eat healthy most of the time, eat happy fatty food once in a while, and relax about your food. Stressing over it tends to make it a bigger and more negative presence in your life than it needs to be.

Don't blame Australians for Outback Steakhouse. NONE of that is Australian. We don't have cheese fries, we don't have Ranch dressing, and Brownies are 100% American. (Also, we don't put shrimp on the barbie. They're called prawns and nobody BBQs them. Gross. I hate our tourist ads).

This was painful. These are all things I love to eat at least once a month. I walk two miles a day, eat oat meal 3 mornings to control cholesterol, steamed rice twice to control acid reflux, use Beano if concerned about gas and eat mostly fruits and salads for dinner. I have lost 68 pound and am now in the right weight range for my build and age. Since I went to the meal time changes my bloo