The next day you’re forced to miss work, rearrange your schedule, and bring your car in for a check up. You notice on your way to the mechanic’s shop that your engine light has miraculously turned itself off. You assure the technician that it was on the day before. However, despite your assurance, after a quick test ride, he tells you there is absolutely nothing wrong with your car.
Puzzled, you leave for work and on your way to the office, you notice the unpredictable engine light goes on once again. It’s then that you realize you forgot to ask the technician about the sounds and smell that were present while driving yesterday. With these problems re-emerging and your car stalling on the freeway, they’re suddenly on the forefront of your mind. With this new information, the technician is able to better assess the problem and find a cause.
When asking questions, give as much detail as possible to those with whom you are speaking. Remember every individual is different. What may be the case for you or your loved one may not be the case for someone else. Also, be sure to ask every question you have (i.e. the importance of making a list). If you have concerns, no matter how great or small, voice them. Entitle yourself to information that will calm your fears and potentially diminish distress.
The most common reason that people do not ask questions is that they forget them. The second most common reason is because people think their questions are insignificant, unimportant, or “silly.” Remember there is no such thing as a “dumb” question.
If you’re worried about a loved one’s illness, frequently, it’s the questions that do not pertain directly to them, but rather to ourselves, that we’re reluctant to ask. Concerns pertaining to you as a spouse, parent, or family member are just as significant as those pertaining to the ill person. For example, I recall a specific concern that I had right after my baby was born. I was waiting for my breast milk to come in. Because this concern had more to do with me at the time than it did for my baby, I was reluctant to voice it. However, I eventually did address this concern with my OB/GYN and received an incredibly helpful tip.
