Being Anorexic and Bulimic

By: Carmen Electra (View Profile)

I’m 1.52 cm... and weighting 120 lbs, that’s too much, my clothes doesn’t fit, I was a size 0 and now I’m a size 5, I’m really depressed, I wear only relax clothes. I’m so embarrassed, that all the people can see how fat I am, I try every day to eat less, I’m trying to throw up, but it seems like I’m too heavy right now also my metabolism is really slow, and I have become lazy, I don’t wear fashion clothes since, I look awful with it.

Now I have even cellulite, something I hate and that I didn’t have, I hate myself for not being  skinny and not able to control myself I’m still trying and hope i can get to be a size 0 again, I hate my boyfriend for encouraging me to eat, sometimes I even think he left me since I’m too fat, I’m really depressed. I still love him, I need him in my life, he made me so happy, I know I will get over this time and become skinny again... I can’t stop thinking about food, I hate myself, but when I eat I can’t stop all the guilty feelings around my head...

 

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posted: 05.25.2007
Lesley Nicholls
Carmen, please calm down for a moment. Take a deep breath. Go outside and enjoy the sunshine: it's summer. If it's not summer where you are, imagine it was. 75 lbs is not an ideal weight for someone your age. Maybe it's appropriate when you are 4 yrs old! Please try to love yourself. Stop being so critical. Change your focus. I know you are a strong a beautiful person just by the words in this essay. You are brave because you can admit your real hopes and present them for the world to read. Only a brave woman would do so! Please keep us updated.
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