I have a fifteen year old daughter that my parents take care of because I’m unable. I’ve been married and divorced three times. I gave bulimia all my time and commitment!! Thanks for letting me tell my story. I felt I needed to share. I don’t have much support. My family is still in denial. They still don’t see how it has anything to do with them. I have a boyfriend, but he doesn’t get it. I have two dogs. If you want to comment or share, please do.
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Helen, Thank you for sharing your life with us. I feel like i need wake up calls everyday, and your story was the wake up call for me to hopefully get through this day! God Bless you! Stay strong. If there is ONE thing i am learning, the hard way, it is that you cannot let people who dont "get it", throw you into a tail spin, and downward spiral! Only you can pull yourself through the hell, but if you dont have someone who is a constant support, who doesnt judge you or preach to you or lecture you, you will have an even much harder battle. The unconditional love, compassion and support, through good days and bad, is what gives me so much hope and faith! PLEASE, dont let this demon have you!
i guess i should write a story instead of comments, because i am using up too much space. my heart goes out to every single person living with this hell and i pray God has a plan to keep us all safe and give us the strength to fight and live. there is no short fix or cure. this is the hardest thing i have ever had to face and i want so bad to beat this and move on with my life. i journal all of my meals, which helps so i can also see the patterns and moods that contribute to the bad days. when i am sad, i dont eat. when i am mad, i eat and purge. so the middle ground is nibbling on good foods, that dont have many calories and hoping they dont "trigger" a binge because of the fact my stomach has something in it. it has been such a "fix" for so long, and training my body and mind to find other fixes that are healthy is so freaking hard. it is so easy to convince myself that i will be fine because i havent had many physical effects, other than insulin reactions. this sucks!
Helen and Melissa. omg. i dont even know where to begin. Helen, i feel like your pain and suffering and physical effects from bulimia will be the next chapter in my life if i dont stay focused and get rid of the demons! i am a 36 year old mother of 3 beautiful children, 12, 6 & 5. i am on my 2nd marriage, which is on the rocks because of all the attention i have had to place upon myself to get well. i have been in therapy and seeing a nutritionist since March 2007. i have good days and bad days, just like everyone else who lives this hell. i have the mind set to get healthy, because the thought of not seeing my children grow up, graduate, go off to college, get married and have children of their own, completely kills me! i picture my family and friends at my funeral when i feel the urge to purge. sometimes it helps, sometimes, that demon says "screw it"...get it over with and try harder next time. but none of us knows when the next time will cause our hearts to stop beating.
helen, i am so on my way to being in your shoes. thank you for sharing your painful story. i am a 40 year old mom of 3 little guys and i am so scared to death. i just dont think i can stop. some days i think i am ok and on top of the world and others, i feel so out of control. melissa
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