Life starts out so innocently, so naively, so filled with promise. So much can happen as we grow, that can mold our thinking processes, and equip or not equip us to be honest, responsible, respectful, and honorable human beings. That’s where it all starts, isn’t it? As a “being?” No name, no history, or at least, no earthly history. This being has either just landed in a home of serenity and harmony, or in a home of anger and abusive language and behavior. And then this being who becomes a name and a person, must decide which way they are going to go. Some kids never touch a drink or drug because their parents were alcoholics and drug addicts. Their own sibling may follow in their parents’ footsteps. I don’t believe anyone knows why that is. What if a man lies to his wife in front of his kids, and steals from his neighbor’s garage while his young ones look on? One brother grows up to be a car thief and a habitual liar, and the other brother becomes a monk. Why? Why don’t both lie and steal, or both be honest and trustworthy?
Destiny, free choice, different strokes for different folks, character traits from mom taking over dad’s bad behavior, or vice versa? No matter which way we lean, we’ll have to deal with the baggage we add up along our way. That’s usually in our thirties, sometimes forties, if we really love denial. Denial can allow us to like ourselves even when we’re doing wrong. Denial allows us to fall asleep after we just committed a petty crime. Denial, needs to become reality at some point. That’s when all the baggage has to be sorted out. What am I angry about? Why do I have to drink so much? What am I trying to run from? Am I even trying to run from anything? Or is it normal to be like me? How do I know?
Books. That’s where I started. Reading about dysfunction, and anger, and baggage, and shame and guilt and anguish and unresolved feelings leading to depression, frustration, and hurt. How do you get rid of this “baggage?” I learned from reading the books I non coincidentally picked out at the book store, that first, you have to admit everything you’ve been repressing, then you have to name it all, and then you need to try and make amends to as many of those things or people as you can.
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