What Is Good Emotional Health?

By: Ida Centoni-Montgomery (View Profile)

Keeping Your Problems in Perspective 

We all have them. Problems. And if you’re like most people you would love to learn how to avoid problems altogether. Perhaps you would also like a better understanding what good emotional health is and how it effects how well you deal with the unexpected challenges of life. 

First, ask yourself a question. Do you keep your problems in perspective? People with good emotional health are in control of their thoughts, feelings and behaviors. They feel good about themselves and have good relationships. They can keep their problems in perspective by a connectional understanding, it’s not what happens to you – it’s what you do with what happens to you. They know emotion creates motion.

To help you use this idea you must first begin with the examination of your state management. How we represent all of our experience, and how we feel as a result is where our emotional mastery begins. The “state” that we are in at the time the problem presents itself drives our reaction to it. Sometimes this is good – sometimes bad.

So when is it good? When a firefighter is going Code 3, just the activity itself will put an individual into a state; a physiology, a pattern of language and a pattern from experiences and references of what they should believe about the situation and what they should focus on. This triad is the source of state management. Your physiology, your language, your focus and beliefs cause emotional triggers, and that effect triggers your behavior.

When is it bad? Sometimes it is something as simple as best laid plans don’t prevail for you. You go into a state of frustration focusing on the problem, not the solution, and the belief that it is the worst thing that could happen to you in that moment, day or week. In this situation your physiology, your language and focus are most often not at their best and you feel and know you have behaved badly. 

How do you avoid problems and deal with your emotions? Conditioning. Go to the “Mind Gym.” Seek ideas, options and perspectives so you can try to recognize your emotions and understand why you are having them. Learn how to sort out the causes of sadness, frustration and anger in your life so you can help yourself better manage your emotional health. Learn to express your feeling in appropriate ways.

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posted: 08.06.2007
Jean V.
Ida, thanks so much for this piece, I whole heartedly agree with you, and I even borrowed a quote from you to add to my scrapbook of inspiration, "It is your consistent daily actions, not what you do once in a while, that determines how you can create a compelling future" I can identify with that because I, like everyone else go through periods of time that everythign seems so blah; I feel disconnected from everyone I know and lonely and the days seem to blur together and have no meaning. I know there are things I can do to combat this feeling and appreicate my life more and be more connected to others, and more happy, but for some reason I get in a rut and can't break the cycle for a while until I get totally sick of feeling that way and decide its time for a change. I tell my boyfriend that I find it exhausting that I constantly have to strive to put effort into my days to make them good days but if thats what it takes to be happy then I will try to keep on keepin on, every day.
It feels good to write.

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