Joyology: The Art of Recovering Our Lost Joy

The worst has happened. If we let it be that is. What we do to ourselves is often nearly as bad as the original trauma. That child was abused, neglected, manipulated, beaten, raped, slapped, starved, silenced, or any combination of those. There are people in this world who are willing to transcend their own denial and stand with you. I say speak your truth. People may not agree. You’ll be told to forgive and forget, you’ll be advised against anger. People may surprise you and validate you, which is amazing. Most times, people want you to shut up so they don’t have to think about the reality of what you are talking about.

This is why we have to fight for ourselves. Monsters fester in the darkness of secret keeping. This includes secrets we keep from ourselves. Fight for the child you were, just as you would fight for any child. We do not have to listen to the voices of those who stand looking, ready to plow us down with their self-serving negativity and denial.

Actually, we can reap great joy from devastating pain. Beauty can emerge. She wants too. We have to allow her too. You are already a survivor, now you can thrive. You can flourish and blossom. Do it, effloresce, germinate. Do not shrivel or wither for anyone. When you are knocked down or when you knock yourself down, get back up. You can be a warrior. You already are. Open to your innate luminosity. You can ride the moon across the diamond stars: you can slay the demon, for you have withstood the storm.

“The winds of grace are always blowing, but it is you that must raise your sails.”—Rabindarath Tagore

I used to wince at the concept that I had any control,. But it is ok to not be able to feel completely empowered right away. It takes time. Do what you can, when you can. Control, true empowerment are two different things.

To do this healing, we must renovate our inner garden. We must propagate new beliefs and thoughts in our inner earth. Now we must beckon the pure moments, they need fertile loving. Our garden of joy is waiting.

No matter how dark or mangled your sense of self has become, you were once a child, and that child lives on inside of you. Bring her/him to the light and show her the path to the flower fields.

“From obscurity came forth a light and illumined my path.”—Kahlil Gibran

Call her name, lay her among the healings waters.