When I got to his house, he acted as if we were still dating, and I was more than confused. Christmas eve, we ended up have sex, and I immediately regretted it, knowing that it just didn’t feel right. He had, as during our entire relationship, “convinced” me to have sex, begging me, telling me everything I wanted to hear. He told me how beautiful I was, how much he had missed me. Everything but the truth and how he really felt.
The next day, we went skiing. It was much more fun that I thought and after a while, I started thinking maybe we had just slipped up—maybe we could just be friends. On the way back to his house (where my car was) I fell asleep, exhausted, and decided to stay on his couch that night. That decision--and many others--are why it has been so hard to accept what happened next:
He started to kiss me on the couch, me half-asleep. I asked him to stop, but he wouldn’t. I turned my head away and told him, flat out, that we weren’t in a relationship and I wasn’t his girlfriend. He started again to beg and plea with me to have sex with him—he told me that since we had “done it” the night before, it wasn’t any different. He said, “I tell everyone you’re my girlfriend. I think of you as my girlfriend,” as sincerely as possible.
I looked him in the eye after that and said, “But I’m not your girlfriend, am I? I don’t mean anything to you,” there was nothing he could say. By that time, it was late and he was pawing me again, pulling at my clothes. Almost to make him stop, I agreed—I don’t know why I said okay at first, but I’ve thought about it a lot. I was tired of fighting him off, and felt so awful about saying that I would stay over in the first place. As soon we were in his room, I said no again. I didn’t want to. But he kept insisting, manipulating the situation, and my emotions for his gain.
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