I dropped out of high school and got my high school diploma from night school. I then applied and got into a university in my state. All of a sudden, my mother had decided to let me back into her good graces. Ridiculous, that it takes getting into college to do this. I still remember going over to their house that day. My mother had gotten me a sweatshirt with the university logo on it. Some how the evening turned into a horrible scene ending with me yelling and pointing at my step-father; “He sexually abused me.” My step-father reached over the couch and tried to punch me in the face. I moved out of the way just in time. I didn’t speak with them again for some time. I believe it was about a year and a half.
I am now almost thirty years old. The memories that I have just outlined for you are just a few of the things that have happened to me. To this day, when I am around “him” my skin crawls. Even on my wedding day, I cut the father-daughter dance short; I couldn’t stand to be near him or even touch him. He doesn’t have the right to hurt me anymore, nor did he ever. My mom, and even brother, does not believe me. Sometimes I think it would be better to end the relationship with the three of them, rather than live like this. The sexual abuse happened. It’s a fact. I need to be true to myself. I can’t keep pretending it didn’t happen, because that’s what they want to believe.
For anyone reading this, I am just beginning my journey of recovery. I know it will take a very long time. But I have faith in God—that he will heal me.
