After the rain came yesterday and I no longer needed to watch over my crops like a doting father, I went back to the house, stripped and stepped into the shower, slid into a pair of clean jeans, and did something I would not normally do on any given day. I turned on the one eyed monster, channel surfed and found some inane show filled with talking heads, but then, out of the blue, there was this commercial for Botox Injections.
Now, just because I’m a farmer, does not mean I am ignorant or stupid, I had heard of Botox injections, but never gave it much thought until yesterday.
Let me get this straight, help me out here if I’m wrong … you wake up one morning, and horrors! You have wrinkles, so in a panic, you grab the trusty Yellow Pages and riffle your way through and just as you’re about to give up, there it is, in black and yellow, the Jolly Old Botox Injection Store, hurriedly, you make an appointment with them via telephone, you go running out the door, bathrobe flapping crazily in your wake, you fling open the drivers side door, jump into the drivers seat, slide the key into the ignition, fire up the trusty family car, put it into reverse, and screech backwards out of the driveway, narrowly missing Widow Jones’ fifteen pound cat waddling down the street, you jerk the car into drive and in a cloud of blue exhaust you roar out through the subdivision, onto the surface streets of your town.
After driving around in a panic filled haze, nearly creating traffic nightmares at every intersection you cross, there it is! THE JOLLY OLD BOTOX INJECTION STORE! You wheel into a parking space, just missing that Parking Nazi’s cruiser, you jump out, slam the door behind you, and run across the street—that ugly old pink chenille bathrobe still flapping around your ankles like a duck that has been wing shot.
Once reaching the door of the Jolly Old Botox Injection Store, you stop momentarily, you take a deep breath, and muster up what diginity you can, which ain’t much by the way, considering the bathrobe you’re wearing, and those squeaky bunny slippers ... OH PLEASE!
