Oh, that I could see past today and see a future.
But today it is so cloudy and so dark.
What am I here for? Is there a future?
I don’t know, I am so tormented by the failures of today and the destruction of yesterday.
Why can I not live as others do?
To live and let live, to let go of yesterday and grasping ‘hold of tomorrow, taking the ride of their life today?
Who am I? I do not know.
I do not know who I am, who I was or who, if it were; who I could even be.
I no longer possess an identity.
I no longer cling to a hope or a chance for a reason to exist.
My hopes are all but gone.
My hopes disappearing within the haziness of lost yesterdays; choked by the darkness of my failures.
My faith in now only a vapor of what was once raging and full, tumbling over and flooding my life.
Now my life only feels full, full of an emptiness that is slowly gnawing from the inner core of what is now my cold, cold heart.
It reminds me that it is now a place of void, a place of nothing-ness.
There no longer remains any wants, needs or desires for only numbness has taken hold of what was once a vibrant soul.
No dreams exist here for they were long ago shattered and left to be blown away by the winds of life.
Who am I? I do not know.
Somewhere, somehow, I lost myself.
Everything I use to be; GONE.
Oh Lord, where do I go from here?
Where do you go when the road has been washed away by all the tears of loneliness, disappointments and bitterness?
How do you know who you are when you no longer see yourself?
How do you discern when it is safe to dream again when a nightmare is all you see?
Who am I? I truly do not know anymore.
I have slipped into a realm of inexistence.
