Finding Myself

My husband had recently died after a long and painful illness. We met as teenagers and been together as man and wife for over thirty-four years. I was having a difficult time deciding whether I should move on or if I had done everything I could to try to save his life. One night I dreamt our home was flooding—in the dream the house was two stories and the flood waters had reach the second floor. My husband was confined to a hospital bed and as the water came rushing in I was grasping at the rail of the bed, trying to keep him from being swept away. At that moment I saw a child, still in the amniotic sac floating in the opposite direction! I was frantic, trying to grab them both and save them—I could see the child clearly with the umbilical cord and placenta still in place! I woke crying in frustration because I was losing them both. I consulted a psychologist who dealt with dream therapy and was told that my husband was my husband; the child was my unrealized self! My frustration was that I was still trying to find a way to save my husband and at the same time trying to myself! I began to work in earnest to find out who Missi was! I still may not be there, but I will never stop working toward that end—to find and realize my true self!