My Dreams Since I Lost My Daughter

By: Nawanna Combs (View Profile)

My third dream was me, my daddy who has passed away fifteen years ago, my mom, and my little girl were riding in a car from my childhood and this girl I went to school with years ago and have not seen in twenty years ran us off the road. And when I came to, I saw a pile of bodies with my baby on top of it, and this person telling me that I need to make funeral arrangements for her and I asked him how can I do that when I didn’t even have her first funeral done yet.

My fourth dream was on top of a mountain in the clouds, the church that my daughter’s funeral was held in was there and this red headed lady came in and told me that my baby was outside walking around the edge of the cliff. And I ran out of the church and there she was in shorts and a tee shirt walking along the edge of this cliff like mountain and I ran to her and she went and sit down with my mom who was all so sitting on the edge and I told her give her to me before she falls and she handed me my baby and I took her into the church house and I noticed her tummy tube was leaking and I told my mom to watch her while I went to get water to put into her tummy tube. And when I walked out of the door and started through the double doors in the church a lady that I knew tried to stop me and told me that I couldn’t go through the door and I told her that I was getting water for my baby and she was not going to stop me. When I pushed passed her and went through the door I saw my baby coffin but she was facing the other way in the coffin than what she was at her funeral and her daddy was sitting inside of the coffin with her head in his lap and him and this redheaded lady were rocking her coffin back and forth like it was a swing and I screamed at him what in the Hades do you think you are doing, and I woke him up screaming this at him.

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posted: 03.06.2008
Finding Serenity
I don't think that you are blaming yourself. You are going through the steps or stages of grief. I don't remember them all off the top of my head, but in your dreams you are trying to change the outcome of the reality of your life. I feel your grief and understand it. Today is the third anniversary of my son, Adam's, untimely death. He passed away at the age of 22. I had him longer than you had your daughter but that does not make it any easier. To make my life even worse I lost David, my second oldest, this past September 13. Just remember to take life one minute, one step at a time. My goal when Adam died was to get out of bed, shower and get dressed. My goal now is to get out of bed, brush my teeth, shower if I can, get dressed. Sometimes I don't get much more than that done, but I got out of bed. I don't know if this has helped. Just know that you are not alone. Your daughter is always with you, you just can't see her, but she is there. Thank you for listening.
posted: 03.01.2008
Sherrolyn Mincey
I think you feel resonsible for the death in some way. All indications are that you blame yourself. You canot continue to do this. If you have other children they need you now and in the future. You cannot bring back your daughter but you can be there for your family. I suggest you cosult a professional to talk about these dreams rather than try to figure them out yourself. For your sake and your family - SEEK HELP.
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