On the Road: Elbows and Family Bonding

By: Kate Carter (View Profile)

Slim Whitman yodeled on the eight track, and my sister sipped Beep Juice. I was the youngest of three kids, relegated to the middle seat of our orange Buick my dad called Bessie.

Every summer my family of five squished into the car and drove from Florida to Ohio—the land of children’s heavenly dreams, of rivers and corn and forgotten barns and ride-on tractors bigger than houses.

We drove up I-75, through downtown Atlanta, and right before we entered South Carolina, my mother, an inexplicably dramatic South Carolina hater, would say, “Wake me up when we get to North Carolina.” My mom’s prejudice against South Carolina soured our mood as we careened (rather, drove at my dad’s patience-wrecking 55 mile-an-hour crawl) up its interstate. When we reached North Carolina, we all breathed a little easier, and always noticed the flowers dotting the state’s medians.

Although it was infuriating that my mom insisted on packing our lunch—we kids would stare forlornly out the window at McDonald’s golden arches, always out of reach—there is something to be said for the atmosphere of rest stops. It was a lowbrow picnic for families-on-the-go and a chance to see what grass looks like when it grows from red clay instead of sand. We stomached our tuna sandwiches and enjoyed the scenery as much as we could.

Each summer, on the journey north, we spent the night at a Holiday Inn in the mountains of North Carolina. We all acquiesced to endure the long day so that we could get to the Buckeye State as early as possible the next day. The nights in the Holiday Inn were incredible. Maybe I was young, or maybe it was simply a different era, but the giddy jumping from bed to bed, the nighttime dips in the hotel pool, and the cot they rolled in just for me is one of my fondest memories.

It was always the next morning, as we traversed Virginia, when the elbows started flying. As the youngest, I’ve always like being around people. But I’ve also always needed my space. Slowly my brother’s wide-limbed stance would start to bother me. Then it would consume all of my thoughts. Then I would make sure that he didn’t think he could take up more room just because he was a boy, and just because he was older than me. So little by little I would push my elbows farther out, starting a silent war. And then my sister would notice, tell on me, and I would give her a little elbow shove just because I could.

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posted: 03.14.2008
Sharon Tavares
I loved your story. We have had many trips to N.H. in our dodge ram 12 passenger van. We just sold it about a month ago. No need for it any longer. It was sitting in the driveway too much. Many memories made in that van. Our three kids haven't complained that it's gone, yet, but next time we look at the videos or the photo albums, we will feel a sore spot for the big green bus. It was only a four hour drive but our many trips to N.H. were the most fun ever. As a kid, I didn't get to go anywhere far away but my godparents did take me to Maine/Canada when I was 10. They also took along a man named Jean. He was my godfathers best friend. He was like a grandpa to me. He was looking forward to going there and speaking French with people. The trip in my godfathers r.v. was long, but I had my diary. The second day we were there, Jean died while teaching me how to dive in the pool. One day I'll write the story :( but we love keeping road trips fun for our kids, although I won't forget Jean.
posted: 03.12.2008
Jeffrey Lewis
I comment as the father of the author. I mostly remember the music and the group singing on these trips. The elbows are very hazy in my mind, though I think Kate's brother got more hits from his sisters than he gave; at least that is what he has told me over the years. The music: Anne Murray singing The Tennessee Waltz, Willie Nelson singing the appropriate On the Road Again along with those Kate mentions - all still in my mind today. I don't think I was such a slow driver, by the way; just careful because of the precious cargo. Then again, I don't think I'm a slow driver today, though everyone seems to disagree. What fun we had in Bessie; at least it was pretty good behind the wheel in the front seat. Kate's older sister was usually in the middle, just as I was back in the 50's - the responsibility falls on the oldest. Kate's story reminded me of hearing Elvis for the first time on the radio in 1956 - probably in Georgia - singing Hound Dog and Heartbreak Hotel.
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