Compare this to the traditional behavior of girls, who are often found playing in small groups or pairs, where intimacy is key (playing house, jumping rope, hopscotch). Everyone gets a turn regardless of skill and there are no real winners or losers. Because girls are typically more concerned with being liked than being the winner, challenge and status are rare and boasting is discouraged.
So what do you think happens when these little boys and girls grow up and become members of the work force? Because men grew up in hierarchical structures, they are comfortable with organizational charts. Women, conversely, have traditionally been more comfortable cooperating with people rather than controlling them or—worse—being controlled by them.
Businessmen generally have few, if any, qualms about issuing orders or voicing complaints. Most women tend to be uncomfortable pulling rank; better to get one’s way by having everyone agree. Men rarely seem uncomfortable with disagreement, while women typically go out of their way to avoid confrontation.
Particularly crucial to our approach to careers is the fact that men seem to expect to be successful, and when they are, they take full credit. While women hope to be successful, and when they are, generally attribute it to teamwork or luck.
Traditionally, in the business world, the male model of authority was considered superior to the female model of collaboration. However, it’s becoming abundantly clear that effective communicators are fluent with both styles. The key to success lies not only in recognizing and understanding the difference between the two styles of communication, but focusing on and creating for one’s self a style that encompasses the best of both worlds.
Related Story: Lunch: More than Just a Time to Eat
PREVIOUS PAGE
