Is It Ok to Be Nervous in an Interview?

Ah, we all have beginnings. My introduction to the world of career coaching was as a career advisor to the MBA program at UC Berkeley. A typical day there consisted of seeing between eight and sixteen students for thirty to sixty minutes, to help them prepare for interviews. The students would come in to a tiny cubbyhole of an office, barely big enough for the two of us and a desk, without windows. Not the most cheery place to be, but not at all unlike some of the venues where interviews take place.

I’d ask the students about the job they wanted, and crafted a “mock interview,” on-the-fly. I’d take on my tough interviewer persona, complete with pressure-filled questions and interruptions of students’ responses to my questions. After the mock interview, I’d turn back into my otherwise charming self (Okay, the more empathic me) and give them insightful feedback that helped them clearly articulate why the company should really want them, complete with illustrative stories. With each student, I developed strategies to help him or her really connect with interviewers.

I developed a reputation on campus as a tough-ass. That’s pretty funny for a woman who doesn’t clear five feet without a pair of pumps on, and barely ninety-five pounds. So be it.

About a year into my tenure, a student walked in for a mock interview. I asked him what companies he was targeting, and I watched him nearly expire. I mean it. I thought he was choking. Then, I watched a bead of sweat roll down his face. Followed by three more beads, then five more beads, then ten more beads … in a matter of two minutes, he was soaked!

“Are you nervous?” I asked, reflexively. “Uh, no, uh, uh, no … ” he blurted out.

 “Then what are those drops of water doing rushing down your face? Do you usually turn beet red in front of strangers?” I asked, with a tone of “c’mon, just relax” in my voice.

He stammered. Stuttered.

And then I gave him the news—almost everyone gets nervous during interviews.

Sure, sure there are those who love, love, love to interview. Give them an audience, and a wind-up key, and turn the crank a few times and they’re on a roll.

But for the rest of the world? I’ll share with you what I told this guy:

Interviewers generally understand if you’re a little bit nervous. Guess what? That almost assuredly means you have some real desire for the job! So, instead of try to act a lot more formal than you usually are, instead of playing some “canned” version of yourself that you bring out for interviews, you can be real.

“Well, that’s great,” you say, “But, hey, let’s remember, I probably don’t know the interviewer.” You might think to yourself, “So I get kind of nervous around strangers. How can I feel more connected with this person I’m probably meeting for the first time?”