Not sure if you’re graduate level material? Then take this simple entrance exam to find out if a masters in Do It Yourself moneysaving is in your future (Hint: If you’re right now Googling for the name of someone you can pay to take the exam for you, you’ve completely missed the point. Good luck with that Pork Chop-on-a-Stick idea).
Exam Questions:
1) Have you ever been trapped in your own car for an hour because a piece of heavy furniture you refused to pay $60 to have delivered unexpectedly tumbled backwards and pinned you against the seat where you’d crawled to try to push it out the passenger side door?
2) Do you currently suffer from “IKEA Elbow”? This occurs when, having successfully put together one of the low-cost Swedish furniture chain’s simplest patio chairs all by yourself in a mere eleven hours, you decide you can build anything now. The only known cure for this condition is lots of bed rest. Fortunately, you bought a new bed three weeks ago. Unfortunately, it’s still in thirty-seven pieces and you don’t read Swedish.
3) Do you lie to friends about employing a cleaning woman? Not pretending you don’t have one. Pretending you do, so you’re not shunned as the only person in your circle who’s done a cost-to-scrubbing benefits analysis of having someone else remove three inches of solid grease from your oven walls and decided to don the (imitation) rubber gloves yourself.
4) Do you regularly watch This Old House for the handy “dig your own in-ground swimming pool” tips?
If you answered “Yes” to at least two of the above questions, congratulations. You’re definitely masters material.
If you answered “Yes” to all four questions, you’re something else entirely. You’re me.
This means that when confronted with an unnerving situation like rapidly rising toilet water, your first reaction isn’t to panic and call a plumber. Nor is it your second, third, or fourth reaction. Instead, you head to the nearest place that sells plungers. Investing in one’s education is very important, after all.
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