Step Nine: Okay, now find your oil filter wrench (e), and slip it onto your socket wrench. The OFW is a round piece that aids gripping. Since it only grips in one direction, place it in such a way that it pulls counter-clockwise. Loosen the Oil Filter and turn counter clockwise.
Pull it out by hand, being careful not to spill on yourself, and pour the content out into the drain pan. Put the used oil filter aside. Finally, slide out from under the car, pop the hood, and remove the oil filter cap. Allow oil to drain for a while.
Step Ten: Get your new oil filter (b). Read the instructions on the can to learn how to properly deal with it. Dip a little finger into the drain pan and smear some of that onto the bottom of the filter. Then, get a rag and wipe up and around the area under the car where the oil filter fits. This is just to ensure good placement of your filter. Next, take your filter and screw it into place. Put your oil filter wrench over your socket wrench and tighten that up.
Step Eleven: Now, grab your washer and drain plug (the nut you set aside in step seven), and tighten those back into place with your socket wrench.
Step Twelve: Grab plastic bottles (g), your funnel (h) and a Ziploc bag (i). Place funnel atop of opened bottle. Pour oil from pan/bucket, into funnel, which will direct wayward oil down into lovely contained space. Tighten cap on bottle, clean funnel.
Step Thirteen: Pop hood (if not already), find oil cap, and uncap oil cap. Put the funnel into the oil container in your car and pour in the amount of oil (a) recommended by your manufacturer. Use dipstick to check oil level. Twist cap back on.
Step Fourteen: Take old oil filter, put it in a zip lock bag, and seal!
Step Fifteen: Start engine, and look for leaks. Take your used materials to the nearest oil recycling center and dispose of them there.
Step Sixteen: Clean up. Turn off Scorpions. Notice the hair growing on your chest.
By Rachel Thomas
