Bubba and I were sittin’ at his kitchen table sharin’ a couple of glasses of cold sweet tea. While his wife and mine went shoppin’, we were to assemble the Christmas toys for the kids. We had put together a small red wagon and did it in a real smart time, just a little over four hours. Now, we were takin’ a much-deserved break.
“Dang, these toys are a-getting’ harder to put together each year,” Bubba said in a frustrated voice as he raised his ice tea glass and took a big swallow. I noticed he had beads of sweat on his forehead.
“Yep, I would never have imagined a red wagon with anti-lock brakes, an OSHA required safety harness, and a computerized dashboard. They jess didn’t make ‘em like that when we was a-growin’ up,” I felt the same frustration Bubba Lee did. I mean, here we were, two grown up men and we took four hours to put a toy together that was recommended for a four-year-old child. What in the world was the matter with the two of us?
“Well, I ‘spect we would have done better if I hadn’t be a-holdin’ the di-rections upside down until we was ‘bout done,” Bubba admitted his mistake, which was as rare as a banker loanin’ money without collateral.
A few seconds later, I was amazed as he turned to me and said in an almost clear voice, “Ya want a beer?”
“Why shore, don’t mind if I do. But it’s a bit early ain’t it? I mean, it isn’t even ten in the mornin’ yet.” I was a bit shocked that he would offer a beer that early in the day.
“I never drink a-fore five in the afternoon,” Bubba smiled once more, got up and walked to the clock hanging over the stove. Taking the clock down, he adjust the hands until, ya guessed it, it was five o’clock.
“Well, now, Bubba, since it’s five, shore, gimme one,” I had to let out a chortle at the man’s imagination. Bubba opened two beers and placed them on the table. He then bent over and pulled a big box, containing a bicycle he had bought Bubba Junior for the Holiday, to his side. Pulling the top flap on the box open, he looked inside, turned pale, reached over and picked up his beer. Without saying even one word, he guzzled about half of the drink.
