Cycling: Sport of Masochists (and the Sick, the Poor, and the Stupid)

Now, the part of his maxim referring to poor and stupid is easy to figure out. Pursuing a sport that requires a lot of training time, but in which there’s hardly any money (I doubt that there are five women in the entire U.S. who make enough of a salary from pro cycling to support themselves, and I think there are less than fifty men who do so) is an obvious recipe for ending up poor. And if you’re riding your heart out, but not getting paid enough to cover food and rent, then you’re either a masochist, or you’re stupid. So there you have it: pro cyclists are, on the whole, sick, poor, and stupid. You may not start out that way, but that’s the way you’re more’n likely gonna end up.

Everyone wants to believe that her sport is the most challenging, the most difficult, or the one offering the greatest ultimate test of the human mind and physique. I’m no exception. I would argue that road cycling boasts the toughest competitive events in the world of mainstream sports. (Ultramarathons, triple Ironmans, and cross-Channel swims are definitely super-tough, but exist—from my point of view—outside the mainstream. Plus, they’re the kind of event crazy people do once or twice or maybe three times a year, right? Not every week from March to September). Certainly, I would admit that there are sports requiring more skill than road cycling: soccer’s fancy footwork; baseball’s hand-eye coordination; gymnastics’ explosive power and precision. Pedaling a bicycle on mostly paved roads with few obstacles obviously does not compare to these sports in terms of the technical ability and skills required.

However, I believe there’s no sport out there that requires the constant endurance of suffering to the extent demanded by cycling, both in training and in racing. Training for hours at a time—mostly alone—in constant discomfort if not outright pain—is very demanding, physically as well as mentally. After a certain point, there are no new skills to master, no tricks to learn, no shots to perfect. It’s just constant, grinding work with no distractions. Racing for three to six hours a day, often for many days in a row, is also challenging in a way that goes beyond the requirements of other sports, as I see it. Of course I’m biased, but I think cycling is the hardest competitive sport there is—perfect for masochists, or the otherwise sick, the poor, and the stupid.