First it was my sweet junior high school nephew with the heart of gold who mentioned that he was boycotting chocolate. Matt was sending an economic message to manufacturers who use West African chocolate in their candy bars that he was not buying into their exploitation of children as slave labor. When Matt encouraged his family to give up chocolate I had the best intentions to do just that…until I moved to the next conversation and conveniently forgot my promise.
Now, it’s Kimberly from Petroville who is working the talk about ditching the cute Halloween chocolate bars. However, Kimberly gets to the heart of the matter and reminds her readers that the Halloween candy’s main mission is to increase the size of your butt. Is it SO pathetic that I would commit to abstain from chocolate out of fear of an enormous ass over the horror of little children being forced into slavery? Self-centeredness has taken on a new meaning. I’m drowning in my own juices.
Honestly, I am going to make a conscious effort to not to buy big bags of Hershey bars and Kit-Kats, but I never do that anyway. Mostly, I’m afraid that my reputation is on the line because the whole NO CAR experiment and the fact that I moved all the furniture out of my house, and now this no chocolate tangent. If I give up chocolate on top of those other slaps at society, I’m nervous that you will relegate me to the world of the good and self-righteous.
Find it in your heart, not to assign me to that category because it would be a major mis-categorization. Of all people I am not good and I stake my claim on skewering the self-righteous. Please do not allow your mind to place me in either of those boxes, for I do not belong there. Really. Think it over, read the column below and enjoy this photo that found on www.davezilla.com that barely relates to this post.
Remember my sister-in-law, the real journalist? Here is a column she wrote about her son giving up chocolate:
