Just kidding. According to the Catholic Encyclopedia, of the three Saint Valentine’s for whom February 14th was dedicated, all were martyrs and none was particularly interested in love and romance. For the modern day practices, the saints merely donated their name to this day.
The customs of Valentine’s Day are thought to have their origins in a conventional belief of the Middle Ages, in England and France, that birds began to pair halfway through the month of February. For this reason, the 14th day of February was considered especially consecrated to lovers. It became regarded as a proper (meaning acceptable) occasion for writing love letters and sending lover’s tokens.
“Men love romance. They love being romantic. They love women being romantic with them.”
In the centuries since, it has gone from acceptable to compulsory to express romantic feelings on this day, and to spend a great deal of money doing it! The “tokens” have become diamond-encrusted. The expectations around this one day have grown so immense as to be the opposite of what romance needs to flourish.
Men love romance. They love being romantic.
They love women being romantic with them. But the essence, the source, the lifeblood of romance is spontaneity. Not just spontaneity the way we normally think of it, like a sudden impulse. Spontaneous as in authentic, generated from themselves and not a result of some external pressure.
On Valentine’s Day men are expected to deliver their romantic product.
At the appointed hour, regardless of mood, energy, resources, or inclination. Men are often expected to provide gifts and romantic evenings, even marriage proposals, based on how long they have dated a woman, not the depth of feeling they experience. And beware the man that fails for he rarely goes without punishment.
Singles may suffer the most, especially women.
Many of you have heard or read my rantings on Valentine’s Day before. My two main gripes are the effect it has on men and the effect is has on single people, especially single women. For single people, this day invalidates their choices as it makes romantic coupling the be-all and end-all of existence. For men, it usually sets them up to fail for lack of useful information.
