A New Me

I want to give them all that I never had, a loving family, a mother who will always be there when they need her, a place to be at peace and rest the knowledge that no matter what goes on in their life I will be there to help them through it as long as I am alive. Their happiness in this life is important to me. I grew up without that I only remember pain and hurt as a child I was either being molested or beaten for some ridiculous reason or another, I was afraid as a child. I was so scared that I would often hide. I didn’t want to be around anyone. I didn’t want anyone close to me, I lived in the moment not in terms of what would I be when I grew up but how long would it be before the next person came along and hit me or rape me or burn me or God knows what. I know that my children will not live that way. I try and make everyday special for them. I want them to only know that childhood is a pleasant thing. I don’t spoil them, don’t think that I do, they are loved and I think that they feel it every moment of the day. And for that I am grateful.