Becoming Jane From Different Vantage Points

I recently watched Becoming Jane with a friend and her fourteen-year-old daughter.

Here is a little plot outline if you have not seen the movie:

The year is 1795 and young Jane Austen is a feisty twenty-year-old and emerging writer who already sees a world beyond class and commerce, beyond pride and prejudice, and dreams of doing what was then nearly unthinkable—marrying for love. Naturally, her parents are searching for a wealthy, well-appointed husband to assure their daughter’s future social standing. They are eyeing Mr. Wisley, nephew to the very formidable, not to mention very rich, local aristocrat Lady Gresham, as a prospective match. But when Jane meets the roguish and decidedly non-aristocratic Tom Lefroy, sparks soon fly along with the sharp repartee. His intellect and arrogance raise her ire—then knock her head over heels. Now, the couple, whose flirtation flies in the face of the sense and sensibility of the age, is faced with a terrible dilemma. If they attempt to marry, they will risk everything that matters—family, friends and fortune.  

It was funny how differently we all viewed the movie. My friend is obsessed with preparing her fourteen-year-old before she begins to date. She does not want her daughter to make many of the wrong choices she made.  This mother said, “I liked the movie because the characters all made the best choices.” The fourteen-year-old felt that Jane should have married the love of her life even if it meant a life of poverty for the couple and his siblings. I, the forty-one-year-old single, did not see things the same ways as either of them or as clearly. The love of her life, Lefroy, reminded me of some of the immature (but fun) guys I dated in my twenty’s that did not want responsibility or want to grow up.

I may be misjudging Lefroy because he was both sending money home and in law school. But, he did not seem driven and I was irritated at him when he quickly got engaged to someone else and did not tell/warn Jane. Then tried to come back.

I want to find the love of my life as much as the next person! But, I am not sure love is enough to live on. If Jane and Lefroy’s future was painted as modest life; then I would say, “Yes, sacrifice here and there for love!” But, it was implied they would be poverty stricken. I just can not imagine being poverty stricken with the love of your life. If we were in that situation because of illness or injury that is a different matter entirely. But, poverty as a result of being married to someone immature and lazy—that love would fade quickly in my opinion.

Turns out Jane makes a life for herself as an independent single woman.