When I was growing up, it was the natural order of things to find a man, date for a few years, and then get married. Everyone was doing it and if you weren’t doing it, something was wrong with you.
Thank goodness, all that has changed.
Being single nowadays is the norm with a career taking precedence over having that diamond ring and 2.5 children. Nothing wrong with that, of course, but at least single women are starting to feel comfortable with not having to get married and, instead, they are creating a future for themselves and let marriage follow if it may.
One such expert on “singledom” is Amanda Ford, author of Kiss Me, I’m Single: An Ode to the Solo Life (Conari Press, July ‘07), a delightful book for singles. Part coming of age memoir, part clever social commentary, part spiritual meditation, it’s a tender and wise reminder that love has nothing to do with another, but rather is the condition of our own hearts.
Thank you for this interview, Ms. Ford. Can you tell us why you felt the need to reach out to single women?
I was in my mid-twenties and single when I began noticing a distinct theme pervading the interactions I had with friends, acquaintances and strangers: everybody wanted to talk about dating. With my single girlfriends our conversations seemed to begin and end with stories of dating disasters, dating successes, dating strategies, dating theories. We talked about who we were dating, who we wanted to date, where we wanted to go on our dates and where we ought to go to find more dates.
If my discussion was with a coupled friend, she would frequently want to fix me up with her significant other’s best friend or brother or co-worker’s second cousin twice removed. Even people I just met would ask, moments after being introduced, “Are you seeing anybody?” I always felt uncomfortable with that question, unsure how to respond exactly. It was like, “Yeah. I’m seeing a lot of people. I saw my best friend last night, the super hot barista at my favorite coffee shop this morning, my mother one hour ago, and I’ll be seeing my personal trainer first thing tomorrow.”
