Where Were You When I Needed You the Most?

By: Ayo Ashanti ( Little_person View Profile)

I was incredibly lonely last week. I didn’t hear from you. I saw your article in a recent publication talking about the kind of lady that you are seeking to marry. I am here and have been here for awhile.

I’ve seen you in the crowd and all the glitz and glamour that surrounds you daily. Lately, you seem to not notice that I am not there. I cherish what you stand for and how you express your inner most feelings. I’ve been there when things were falling apart and your reputation was at risk. We seem to admire one another, but when I need you you’re just not there.

Why chase after the rainbow? I feel like the person you are looking for is a combination of three women. Buddy, I have news for you, that lady just doesn’t exist. The woman you want is the one you design. You are not a creator or a designer of humans. You’re just like me willing to take the good with a little bad. Wise up and return to your first love—the woman right in front of your face with the beautiful smile.

First published April 2008

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Ayo Ashanti, AZ

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Comments

hi, I loved that!!! Snaps and kodos for you! I saw that as of looking inward and speaking to yourself. For me, I am struggling to take be kind and provide for myself. Money is not the issue, nor is the job and car. man nor kids- which I don't have. Its me loving me. Being there for myself and doing things for my self. I fail to take me- myself to the Doctor, Dentist, Shopping, and having just me time. So now having read your story. It gives me the PUSH, to go on with my life. At times I think it's depression but then again. I think its just me going through the motions. Yes I was a victim of sexual abuse and I think thats why I do me the way I do. Thanks so much!

It's funny how people say how much they are going to be "there for you" but when the going gets tough, none of them can be found. I have been in many situations where I have been left "stranded" by people who "claimed to be there" but when things got to be too much to handle, they just turned "yellow tail" and went the other way, leaving me to defend and "protect myself". I have asked myself that question so many times I have simply given up trying to depend on "other people" who really don't have your back if something goes wrong, honey, learn to depend on yourself. You'll be much less frustrated and annoyed when things DON'T GO AS PLANNED.

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