The gay woman’s perspective: Jody Fischer
You are truly missing out on the greatest experiences of life, my dear. No, I don’t mean orgasm. I mean experiencing true intimacy or closeness with another human. Intimacy can take many forms, CM. This includes holding a baby in your arms and having her look into your eyes, taking a grandparent’s hand and saying, “I love you,” or simply being held by a dear friend when you feel sad. All of these are intimate moments.
First, I want to encourage you to re-think your idea of intimacy and closeness. I imagine you’ve had experiences like the ones I mentioned. And if you haven’t, they take a front seat to having an orgasm.
There are a few areas in life where we must surrender control in order to fully experience something. For example, falling into a deep sleep means giving up control of knowing what’s going on and trusting that you’ll be safe. In my book, orgasm is much the same way. You may want to take a look at how tightly wound up you are and how in control you need to be. I would also suggest speaking with a professional therapist about the lack of intimacy in your life. If you’re longing for that closeness, that means you have the capacity to create it. Put yourself in situations where closeness is within your reach. Start simply. Volunteer at an animal shelter and fall in love with a puppy. It’s never too late to experience intimacy—with yourself and others.
The straight man’s perspective: Chris Kennedy
It’s said that the most powerful sex organ a human being has is the brain. If that’s true, size really doesn’t matter and it IS all about how you use it. I think that’s where you can remedy your issue. You need to change the way you think about yourself.
You don’t mention that you have any medical conditions that would prevent you from having an orgasm. (It wouldn’t hurt to have this checked out but I’m pretty sure that if you had any conditions, you’d know about them from your regular exams.)
