The straight woman’s perspective: Rebecca Brown
You’re right. Small is bad. It’s so much more fun to have a big old nine-or ten-inch thing banging into your cervix every time you have sex, making you feel like you’ve got a bad case of cramps instead of experiencing pleasure. Yeah, that sounds like a dream.
I think you’re dealing with a micropenis, VDub, which is a unit that measures less than two inches when it’s flaccid. About 0.6 percent of men have them, so yes, other people have dicks that small. I don’t think you’re shallow; I do think that while most women wouldn’t admit it, they’d at least wonder deep down (where that tiny trouser snake could never reach) if bigger really is better.
But I did a little research on the microschlong and discovered that its shortness can sometimes be a plus. A dong that only penetrates a few inches can sometimes hit just the right spot, a handy little place known as your G-spot. Since you said the sex is so-so, I’m guessing that this wasn’t the case for you. But lucky you—oral every day! I know a lot of women would be thrilled at the prospect of that. You don’t mention if that’s satisfying or not, but if it isn’t, shame on you for not giving the poor guy some guidance. Help a brother out, why don’t ya, VW? If he has to live with a small Johnson, the least you could do is help him become the King of Cunnilingus. Have a heart.
Bottom line, though—you don’t seem all that jazzed about him, the sex isn’t that great, and all you can think about is his tiny pork sword. Stop wasting everyone’s time and go forth and find your John Holmes.
Read Part Two of the February 4-Way.
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