The straight woman’s perspective: Rebecca Brown
Jenna? Jenna Jameson? Is that you? I’m so honored that you’re a 4-Way reader!
Seven times a week, EG? Seriously? What kind of female Cialis is pumping through your veins, girl? I’m exhausted and a little sore just thinking of all that activity. But I digress …
While I think it’s important to have compatible levels of interest in this area (and clearly you don’t), I’m wondering if you’re focusing a little too much on quantity versus quality. Wouldn’t you rather have a pleasurable and intimate connection the times that you are together? Because the alternative is being with someone who’s on autopilot, someone who feels pressure to perform and stares nervously at the wall while he aimlessly jackhammers away. That doesn’t sound pleasurable or intimate for anyone involved.
You mention marriage, so clearly this is someone you care about in more than just a “bang him seven times a week” kind of way. So if you haven’t talked to him about what you like and what you need, you should. And maybe that conversation isn’t even about what you need and what you’re not getting; maybe it’s a sexy little chat about the things that turn him on the most. Lacy bustiers? Thigh-high stockings and heels? Assless leather chaps? (It takes all kinds, people!) Or maybe he just needs a good old-fashioned pair of white cotton panties. Whatever it is, surprising him with his favorite turn-ons might help up your weekly volume.
But be forewarned: even with those sexy enticements, he may never be able to match your enthusiasm to the tune of seven times a week. Can you be happy with 3.5 times per week, maybe taking some alone time with your battery-operated toys to carry you through the droughts? That’s what you need to think about. If you marry this man—or any man (or woman), for that matter—a mismatch in sexual desire is something you’ll have to work out at some point. Cause honey, if you think you’re suffering now, just wait until you face the prospect of having sex with the same guy for the next forty years. Find a sweet spot you can both live with. As Tim Gunn says, “make it work.”
