Somewhere there is a sock heaven. There must be, for where only one sock can be found the other must exist, somewhere. Did you fall behind the laundry hamper or the dark abyss behind the dresser drawers? Each time I open them I think of you, lonely and scared. Shivering in a dark corner or sucked into a dusty vacuum bag unconscious.
Somewhere between the laundry hamper and the closet you disappeared. Do you have commitment issues? Perhaps my feet were too large and you just couldn’t be yourself around me. Or did the odor make your stomach churn? I never meant to drive you away. I swear that I tried to look out for you and wash my feet consistently. I may have forgotten once or twice. It wasn’t you, it was me.
Is there a portal in the spin cycle that I don’t know about? Are you somewhere tropical, on the other side of the earth sipping a piña colada and tanning in the sunshine? Did you slip off a counter and go out with the trash? I’m so sorry. I never meant to abandon you. Or did you abandon me? Either way, my toes tremble in your absence.
You were faithful to keep my toes warm each day. Did I treat you with the same consideration? You were my lone companion on early morning jogs through fog and rain. I know that sometimes I looked out for myself without considering your feelings. I’m sure that you were as wet and chilly as I.
On the coldest of the winter nights you stayed close, soothing me into deep slumber. I will never forget you. I’m sorry I didn’t mend that hole when I had the chance. I should have shown you how much I cared, but now you will never know. I cannot bear the thought of your infinite absence. Please return to me.
But if you don’t, I wish you the only the best. I believe there is a special place for you, somewhere warm and dry. A place free of lint, and holes that rip into reckless snags. Where you can be reunited with your former counterparts and snuggle up together, folded into a tight bundle. Here you will be complete, no longer one half of a couple.
I will wait for you, my dear lost socks. I will keep a drawer filled with your unfortunate mates, and wait patiently for your return. I vow to wear only black socks from now on, mourning your unfortunate demise. I know they may not match every outfit, but you are worth it.
That is all, my dear sweet friend. I will wait for you, please return to me. A lone sock is simply that, alone.