Just Call Me MacGyver ...

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I was sitting at home watching a movie like every other similar night. Nothing was out of the ordinary. There was a candle burning to my left, releasing an aromatic vanilla and illuminating the room rather subtly. The movie ended and I realized that it was time for me to hit the hay. Getting to bed at a decent time limits the possibilities of me becoming unconscious the next day at work.

I lean to my left and slightly tip the candle to blow it out. What I don’t realize is that I am pouring out hot, melted candle wax all over the arm of my couch. I blow the candle out and I put my hand in the hot wax and open my eyes to what has just happened. At first, I think no big deal, right? It’s just wax, I can just scrape it off. Stupid, Jon … stupid. I turn on the light and find out the problem is much worse. The wax is not coming out. My mind kicks into gear and I start thinking. I have to somehow heat the wax up and simply wipe it away. I said simply because in my mind it all played out simple and easy. I grab a lighter and a paper towel and attempt to heat the wax and wipe it away—all without burning the house down.

That doesn’t work. No, that doesn’t even remotely work. Dumb.

I now try to scrape it off using different utensils that are abrasive enough to remove the wax, but soft enough not to hurt the couch. After trying several utensils from the kitchen, I head off to bed. Keep in mind, I have not given up. As I get ready for bed I continue to think of new ideas and solutions, none of them make it past the idea phase. I slide into bed and fall asleep.

About four in the morning I wake up from my slumber with a genius idea. I get out of bed, grab my iron, and run down and grab a paper towel. Of course! Why didn’t I think of this before? The paper towel should be set on top of the wax and the iron on of top the paper towel. Heating up the wax should cause it to liquify and to be soaked up by the paper towel! I heat up the iron and place it on top of the paper towel. I move the iron around a bit and begin to see slight marks of saturation. It’s working! It’s working!

Picture a half-naked man, holding an iron and a paper towel, jumping in jubilation. Talk about weird. Either way, I came out with a clean couch and smile on my face. No task too small, no problem unsolved, no clothes necessary. It was a bad night … in a good way.


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