PLEASE! Help me get my man to go down...

Consider purchasing a book called "She comes first". He may just lack the education and expericense. He may be totally lost on how to please a woman this way. Consider being open with him on the subject.

I think that you should talk to him about it, and see what he will say. Because most man, they don't go down on females. Just talk to him in see. I'm pretty sure that he would understand, and try to do it. He might like it when he try.

You have more problems than him just not going down on you. If he finds the female anatomy gross, and usually does not climax, and you usually initiate intimacy, there are deeper issues than oral sex here. A female friend of mine had a similar issue with her bf, she discovered that he preferred shemales over actual females. I'm not saying that this is your problem (or his) but rather there are underlying issues here if he's constantly finding excuses.

I THINK U SHOULD BE HONEST WITH HIM AND LET HIM KNOW HOW YOU FEEL AND WHAT YOU WANT BECAUSE ITS NOT FAIR FOR HIM TO GET PLEASURE AND YOUR NOT IT SHOULD BE EVEN I SHOULD KNOW BECAUSE I ALWAYS GET WHAT I WANT

I would not go down until he gives back a little of that pleasure to you. Have you asked him why he will not do this?? Does he know that you would enjoy it? Maybe he thinks that you would not be turned on? I would think after 2 years he would know you enough to know what turns you on. You may just have to tell him that it is what you want... I have a problem with a guy who does not give but will defeniately receive.. Is this how the rest of your relatioship is??? Read Cosmo together.. that may give him the heads-up...

I am not into young girls, which is what a shaved vulva looks like to me, and hence I find it a turn-off. I have never favored the shaved pubes look, either for myself or the lady I am with. It just seems like too much work when the natural state can be so lovely! As for the young man who may not have experienced the joys of cunnilingus much, I would say to him that, while the taste may be an acquired one, I for one cannot get enough of my lady's sex! Not only is it only fitting that a man give her the pleasures that she gives him, it can also open up new realms of pleasure for her in general. Once a woman achieves orgasm in this way, she is more likely to experience it during other sexual activities, enjoy sex with him more, and hence want to have sex more often (which is something most men want!). Encourage him by telling him what you enjoy when he 'goes down' on you, telling him how it makes you feel about him, how it shows his love to you, as well as how it makes you feel when he is doing something in particular that you like. Tell him that, while a man is ready to achieve orgasm in moments, a woman needs more time and attention. Persistence is a great virtue in a man who gives a woman head! If she is enjoying a particular movment, whether it is pinches on her nipples, delicate tongue flicks across her clitoris, or nibbles and licks on her labia, he should be patient and continue doing it until she is satisfied, or tells him something like,"no, not there, go back to what you were doing before!" As in all aspects of lovemaking, communication, free from guilt and unedited, is the key to your shared success. He should feel open to accepting criticism as well. Tell him what you like and don't like, so that he can improve with repeated efforts. Best of luck to you both! -- Lorenzo Duke

many of us men do not go down on shaved real estate, for the same reason you gals sometimes ask us to shave - stubble. It burns to be scratched by stubble. Some of us really love total natural hirsute women. The shaving and depilatory thing is one more bit of hyper promotion of snake oil by the huge "beauty" industry, that is totally unhealthy and counter to the fight against STDs. Have you talked to him about the issue(s)? Talking is one other form of communication that enhances any relationship.

As in all matters sexual, I would hope that you have discussed the matter with your lover! You need to separate out the many aspects of oral sex, and find out what is keeping him from showing you his caring in that way. Yes hygiene helps, and 'trimming the garden' can't hurt either. I have found that a person's diet can affect the taste and aroma of their secretions, whether it is sweat , semen, or vaginal secretions. My Ladylove is a vegetarian, and her taste and aroma overwhelm me with desire for her at times! But that is just me.. There are also other issues, Psychological ones, religious ones, bad experiences not yet overcome... But communication can help the two of you work out whatever the problem is. NOT communicating will NOT help you solve this issue. If it is important to you, and reciprocity *IS* an important aspect of lovemaking, then tell him that it is bothering you. Telling him that, "If you don't do that for me, I won't do it for you..." may not solve matters (although it could motivate him to give it a try!). If you are comfortable doing so, have someone you trust, whether it is your doctor, your priest/rabbi, or just a mutual friend explain how much it means to you... and maybe he will 'take care of you' down there as well. Good Luck! -- L.D.