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One White Glove

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I was obsessed with Michael Jackson when I was a kid. I mean Obsessed with a capital O! I had the posters, cassettes, the t-shirts, and oh … yes I had one white glove. I was a twelve-year-old that had LOST my mind! If it even had a picture of him on it, I had to have it! I would sit up all night long and watch MTV just waiting to see that “Beat It” video!

I am convinced that I learned just about everything I know from MJ! He taught me that if I had a chimpanzee, maybe I could be popular. He taught me that men that grab themselves are just a little bit sexy. He taught me that just because you lose one of your gloves, doesn’t mean you can’t wear the other one! Most important he taught me that adding sequins to an army jacket is a nice way to spruce-up any outfit! He moonwalked his way into my heart and taught me some pretty important lessons about life.

Beat It
Night after night of staring at MTV did not leave me with bad eyes, or terrible grades. It left me feeling like violence is never the answer. The Beat It video changed my life. Michael showed me that you can settle any problem you have by dancing! This has come in handy many times in my adult life. I remember that drunk girl I had a dance-off with at a kegger for the last beer in ’93. I break danced my way into a high paying promotion once. In fact just today Karla and I arrived at the copier at the same time, I looked at her and said, “No need to fight about this I will moonwalk you for it!”   

“Billie Jean”
I am still mesmerized by this video. I can still see MJ walking down the street with lights glowing under his feet. Billie Jean is not my lover, she’s just a girl that thinks that I am the one. I felt guilty just listening to it! I thought when I grow-up I want a guy that can make my bed light-up and then turn invisible. Instead I got a horrible one night stand with tragic cigarette catch my hair on fire guy, which never called back. I learned videos are way more romantic then real life!

For years I was afraid to walk by graveyards. I blame this video. I think Michael made being dead look good! I still know all the moves to this video. I am not afraid to bust them out at a cocktail party. I just think that I could work-it better if I had zombie back-up dancers. This video always made me look behind me on dark streets, and kept me from trusting any guy I was on a date with. Thanks to Michael I was scared men turned into zombies if they stayed out too late. There is a bit of truth to this, actually they turn into horny, drunk, morons that disappear when the sun comes up.

“Smooth Criminal”
All you have to do, to make crime wholesome is add Michael and a killer beat! First he was against violence. Then he was promoting it. I wanted to be a criminal after I saw this video, instead I just dated them. You may not like his music, but you can’t deny the boy could dance! Nobody else in the world could get away with wearing an all white suit after Labor Day! This just sums up what we all ready know; girls love bad boys.

This video had more crotch grabbing then a cup check in high school wrestling. I loved it! You would be lying if you said you didn’t love it too! The world watched as MJ tried to change his squeaky clean image. It didn’t work. Screeching like a girl while fondling yourself, doesn’t make you more manly. But it sure makes for some damn good television.    

“Man In the Mirror”
A video where Michael made no appearance. At first I was saddened, and then I was like oh … I get it! If you want to make the world a better place take a look at yourself and make a change. The jokes went around about all his plastic surgery, but they did not take anything away from the message. This song made me think. Think about who I was, what I would do with my time here, and made me wonder if I was just imagining if Michael was getting, well … whiter? 

Michael Jackson changed music as we know it. He broke color lines no one knew existed until he crossed them. He made me want to dance. You may not agree with the way he lived his life. But you can’t argue that when he left this world … it changed.


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