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The Things I Would Love to Forget – A Young Nigerian Forgets

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For many, the end of a year is a time to think back on all the memorable moments from the previous twelve months and compare it with previous years. On my part, I prefer to do a tradition of performing a mental cleanse, removing from my hard drive all the things that should no longer be cluttering my mind as the new year opens.

This is a list of the things I’d like to forget, circa 2009:

  • That Nigeria’s five big bank managing directors, all of which took taxpayer money and were having a field day with billions of naira, were removed by the CBN.
  • That we know as much as we do about David Letterman’s sex life.
  • We know as much as we do about Tiger Woods as a “spreader.”
  • That we know as much as we do about Michael Jackson’s life (and death).
  • Professor Soludo joined in the “governing” sense, picking the PDP ticket and saying voters had every right to be happy and vote for him.
  • That Chris Uba’s wallet and antecedent drove (forced) him to AC.
  • Yar’Adua became an absentee president and endless hours of precious media air time given to the ailing president.
  • Knee-jerk, toothless, Aondoakaa pointed to anxious Nigerians that their president can rule from anywhere—while the nation is disintegrating before our eyes!
  • The government’s promise of giving Nigerians 6000 megawatts of electricity refused to follow through—even after multi-billion naira was committed to the project.
  • That Alhaji Mutallab, who disapproved of religious fanaticism is labeled “father of terrorism” by the media. I consider him a casualty, one of the many casualties of the war on terror. At last US has blacklisted Nigeria because of one brainless Islamic fanatic—
  • bred in Yemen. Alas, all of us are casualties.
  • Nigeria qualified for 2010 World Cup and Chicago lost out in the battle for the 2016 Olympics despite the combined star power of Oprah and the Obamas.
  • That even after other countries’ stock exchange revived, the Nigeria stock exchange is still receding.
  • Niger Delta militants were offered “amnesty before justice.” How obtuse!!!
  • Water boarding and Boko Haram.
  • Jacques Chirac’s revelation that George Bush told him in 2003 that he wanted to invade Iraq to thwart Gog and Magog.
  • That US is spending $30 billion a year to take on the 100 al-Qaeda members still in Afghanistan—that’s 1,000 U.S. soldiers and $300 million for every one al-Qaeda fighter—in an unnecessary war of choice.
  • The beer summit.
  • That after an inspiring presidential campaign that promised to take on the special interests, special interest lobbyists flexed their muscles (and their wallets) and showed who really runs the show in DC.
  • The Lisbon treaty was passed.
  • I saw for the first time, homosexuals in Festac Town, Lagos—the negativity of globalization.
  • Sarah Palin’s resignation speech. Sarah Palin’s feud with David Letterman. Sarah Palin’s book tour. Sarah Palin. Sarah Palin!
  • And there was Obama’s Nobel Irony Award speech.
  • The death of my younger brother Ikechukwu in a road traffic accident in Bauchi in January and my mother Mary in road traffic accident in Umuahia in November. Tried as I may, I can’t forget these deaths.

While we’ll keep peering into our LCD screen of reality in the new year, we have no excuse to ignore what’s happening immediately around us. I exhibit faith in time—things will get better. Year 2010 can only get better.


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