Advice I Wished I Would Have Paid More Attention to Forty Years Ago

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I was raised in the boomer generation. Expectations of life, love, work, marriage, and discipline were very different than today. I have seen a lot of life in 60 years, been through the highs and lows, been divorced, raised a son alone for many years before remarrying, and witnessed both life and death. Although the generations perceive their reality from diverse perspectives, some of the advice I received along the way may be helpful for you.

1. Be yourself- this sounds easy, but can be quite difficult. Peer pressure, fashion trends, and the antics of Hollywood stars and sports heroes can make it challenging to stay on your own individual course. It is easy to be led astray in order to “fit it” with the crowd, but you ultimately will not be happy if it goes against your values.

2. Don’t dwell on the past- continually looking back on the past doesn’t make it go away. It is it was; you can’t change it. It is a part of your past. Learn from it and move forward.

3. Value today like it was your last- boomers were taught to work, work, and work. No play until the work was done. Sunday best or good shoes were saved for just that day. Balance your life with family, work, play, and spirituality. Don’t wait to wear your Sunday best; you may not fit into it the next time! Look and plan for the future, but live for today.

4. Never forget your women friends- our generation of women longed to meet the man of our dreams, the white knight on the horse, who would take care of us forever. Life usually doesn’t happen that way. Always cultivate and nurture your women friends. These sisters will help you through many of life’s struggles and will outlive many relationships and husbands. They are golden.

5. Always be able to take care of yourself- so many women of my generation did not further their education; instead, married early and started a family. Then, when marriages dissolved found themselves alone with children to support, few jobs (minimum wage), and no credit. Strive to get the best education possible so that job opportunities will be more plentiful. That includes maintaining your own bank account as well as your own credit cards.

6. Rely on the golden rule as your motto- Do unto others as you would have them do unto you- treat people with respect and don’t be so quick to judge. It is becoming common place in our culture to criticize and trash other people without regard for their feelings or consequences. No one really knows what the other person is going through or thinking. They may not live by your rules or see the world your way, especially in this country of diverse cultures. Have more compassion and empathy.

7. Take responsibility for your behavior and actions- It is very easy to try to put the blame onto other people for our outcomes when it doesn’t turn out as anticipated, but, in truth, it is our actions that determine the outcome (most of the time). Own up to whatever has happened, analyze the situation, and improve upon it.

8. Love- tells everyone you love that you love them. Don’t assume they already know it. It always feels good to hear it.

The few advice tips can help any woman, no matter what age you are.

Rosemary King is an Adult Nurse Practitioner, health coach, and hypnotherapist. She can be contacted through


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