Jealousy or Joy

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Today I text my best friend from college, I do not want to work at 8:00 a.m. anymore, why did I not think of something awesome to do when I was younger? Instead I was confused and lost throughout my twenties … spending most of the time on dead-end jobs and bartending. I say I am playing the lottery every day until I win and then I can split the money with her so we can finally open up that fashion boutique and fly to New York City every weekend. Although I am sure this will never happen, it is enough trudge through the day and make it until lunch.

I check my Facebook status on my lunch break, and, low and behold, my friend from college selling the rights to a book for a movie deal. The day before a girl I went to high school with was talking about how amazing her husband and family are. I think I may have a case of the jealousies. I hear someone is pregnant with twins, and instead of joy I feel sad. My ex-boyfriend from college is marrying the girl he dated after we broke up. The build up to me wishing I had started a family, wrote a great book, thought of something so amazing that it would change the world goes through my head every day.

I know that I should be happy for the life I have, but when you are watching the updates of the royal wedding, Real Housewives of Wherever, and even personal friends’ amazing lives, it is hard not to say, “Wish that would happen to me just once …”



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