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When Your Heart Says Yes, But Your Mind Tells You No

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So I have a friend that I am very attracted to, and day by day the feelings are starting to get stronger. I’ve known her for years: to be exact since we were kids. I recently have got back in touch with her … and the first time seeing her in many years I can say I was breathtaken on how she has blossomed into a beautiful woman. As a young man, the first reaction was all lust.

Then upon conversing with her, I could see she was more than a beautiful face. She was something I haven’t seen in a long time. A smart, passionate, and genuinely kind person. It was like a breath of fresh air to talk to her about anything.When I was talking to her nothing else matter around me. In a short amount of time of chilling with her, I noticed that she had me doing things I never do. The problem is she has a person she is talking to and has very strong feelings for him. I don’t want to be disrespectful or confusing to her about the situation. I have told her how I feel: to an extent. She has told me the problems she has with male friends falling for her and she doesn’t have mutual romantic feelings for them. So when I heard that I knew I had to learn my boundaries or possibly end up like them and get my feelings hurt.

She is definitely one of the truest persons I have ever known. I’m not going to lie; I usually don’t open myself up to someone unless I know them well and get comfortable. But she has this spell over me that makes me want to just please her, but I can’t ‘cause she’s not mine. I would like to let her know that it’s not just an infatuation, but a real sincere strong feeling for her. I feel like I can’t let that get in the way of are friendship, because I do cherish it. So for now, I will just have to keep my feelings under wrap until the right time presents it’s self. I guess I’ll see what time brings me. But I’m still dazed and confused.
 
What also makes it worst is I think I find her looking at me on occasions, but I don’t know what the looks are. I feel that they could be looks of thought … but I could be wrong—or worse, right, which would be more confusing. I feel like there could be a mutual attraction physically or personality-wise, but she is so nice, it’s hard to read. This is why I’m dazed and confused.

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