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Reasons Why I Should Not Be a Waitress

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Wishing customers a happy Easter instead of a happy new year.

Telling customers that the vegetables of the day are MOOSH (beans & maize cooked together) instead of Chubby mix (cabbage, carrots& cucumbers)

I don’t know how to open a f* wine bottle!!!!

Taking the customers pizza away before the customer finished eating.

I forgot to roll the cutlery for six tables and put it on their table before their food came out.

I do not know the pizza numbers from one to thirty-four and what is in them, or WTF a beef shawarma and meze platter is. I do not even know the whole f$%# menu.

Ordering a Parolaccia sauce for a customer who instead wanted a Gino’s Dutch Sauce.

Ordering two pizza’s for a customer who instead wanted three and telling the customer that the kitchen is closed and they cannot make her third pizza.

Being trained second time around. (Hectic, I know!!)

Asking a customer how they would like their pork done.

Asking a customer which pasta they would like their lasagna to go with (spaghetti, fettuccini (REAL ITALIAN NAME>FETTUCCCINE) or penne). Psst lasagna has its own pasta.

Asking a customer if they want an Irish coffee with Kahlua, Cape Velvet, or Frangelico (apparently, Irish coffee only goes with whisky).

Making shitty cappuccinos.

Delaying customer’s drinks.

Not knowing which fish is the catch of the day.

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