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Mom Breathes as Dad Bonds

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I had just returned home from a weekend alone in the city. Some people responded to this with a confused smirk. Why were you in the city of all places? Why were you alone? Why didn’t your husband go with you? Why are you acting like this is a good thing? Not only was this mini escape a good thing, it was a great thing! As the stay-at-home mom of two small children, I am exhausted all the time. I don’t know why. I know there are moms out there of even more children who walk around like life is great and don’t even hint at even needing a yoga class to force them to breathe. I don’t know how they do it. I admire their endurance and contentment with this rewarding, though strenuous and exasperating job. But I am not one of them. Motherhood does not come naturally to me. Yes, I bore my children naturally, but even that didn’t seem so natural.

After the last couple of months filled with various sorts of illnesses, allergy attacks, religious holidays, pseudo-vacations to visit family, the onset of a new school year, the scheduling of various activities and play dates, the adjustment of helping with homework everyday, I found myself physically and emotionally spent. And it was only October! I had no patience left for the kids, my husband, or even myself. Maybe I am just weaker than the average mom, or maybe I just am more selfish, but I need time to regroup each day. Unfortunately, there was no chance of that during the last 2 months, which left me at the brink of a not so minor nervous breakdown.

My loving and understanding husband, whom I clearly don’t appreciate as much as I should, set me free for the weekend. I chose to go to the city, a place that I love, that energizes me and has great yoga classes, shopping, restaurants, and very importantly, friends. So late Friday afternoon through Sunday evening, I relaxed, I ate, I drank, I slept, I shopped, I practiced yoga, I convened with friends – in all, I regrouped. My husband and kids also had a great weekend filled with quality bonding time. They toasted marshmallows in the fireplace. They went pumpkin picking. They “jumped on Daddy” a lot. And of course they ate lots of junk food. This morning, for the first time in her 4 years of life, my youngest said to me, “I miss Daddy.” Clearly, not only did I benefit greatly from this weekend away, but my family did too.

When I returned home, my kids were so happy to see me. I had never experienced the exhilaration of my kids animated reception, something my husband gets each time he walks in the door. It was amazing. They couldn’t stop hugging me. And honestly, I couldn’t stop hugging them either.


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